There are several rules to follow when it comes to parenting. However, every parent chooses to be different in their approach. As a parent, of course, you do your best in raising your kids. However, there are some seemingly minor things you do that can cause a pretty severe psychological damage to your children.
Based on pediatric counseling discussions, parenting is never easy, but it’s not enough reason to get distracted in handling your child’s psychological condition. Let’s take a look at these mentally destructive habits that BetterHelp arranged for us so we can try to evaluate the things we think are normal.
Always In A Hurry
Being a busy parent, there’s still a need for rushing because we somehow want to have enough time to get everything done. From home duties, after-school activities and personal errands, we are accompanied by a stressed-out grumbling. We might think that it’s normal, but it’s not. We somehow pass on the stress we have and let our kids carry the pressure for us. It affects our children in a way that they become worried about everything they do. In severe cases, it leads to mental health problems such as anxiety and depression. Our children tend to adopt the trait, and that impacts their emotional and behavioral state as well.
If you have kids that are three to eight years of age, their minds are ripe and ready for learning. Your family nights can consist of reading stories or books that activate their imaginations, or you can play games that encourage them to use math or spelling skills. — Wendy Rice Psy.D.
Children need structure and stability, so our inconsistencies in setting ground rules can complicate the logic of discipline. Our constant flip-flopping decisions confuse our kids and may affect their mental reasoning area. For example, when your child asks for something and you say “no,” they’ll probably throw a tantrum. So for you to stop him, you tend to give what he wants. It will create a lasting impact on his personality as he slowly develops emotional characteristic such as patience, aggression, understanding, confusion, and self-awareness.
Feeling that parents are being dishonest can lead to resentment and anger. — Katelyn Alcamo, LCMFT
Inducing Panic And Fear
Fear has nothing to do with respect. As a parent, we often think that when our kids are afraid of us, they are bound to respect our decisions. However, it’s nothing like that. Screaming and shouting at our kids over a small mistake creates a negative impact on their emotional and psychological health. It will damage their critical thinking skills and might struggle to fix things around them. They might lose their confidence because of the constant fear of unintentionally creating a mistake. In the long run, they will eventually fear failure and will end up avoiding the things they thought they couldn’t do.
Choosing Technology As Reinforcement
It’s a fact that there are dangers in using too much technological stuff. However, because we want our kids to experience and feel safe in our comfort zone without disrupting us, we tend to ignore its harmful effects. Thus, we allow them to spend too much time on mobile gadgets and use them as a distraction so they won’t take too much of our time. In most cases, we often use them as reinforcement to the good things we ask them to do.
Retrospective studies of “single-incident traumas” find that both direct and indirect exposure, including media exposure, can significantly increase feelings of anxiety, fear and vulnerability in youth. — Alec L. Miller Psy.D.
As a parent, we commonly think that we know almost everything when it comes to our children. However, there are still considerations that we need to understand to avoid damaging habits we do that affect our children’s emotional and psychological development.