The Empathic Ears That Listen
[Raising a Disabled Husband and Father]
God sometimes plays a joke on us, but his jokes are always for a purpose. This poor man’s suffering brings us together in celebration. – Breathe
Robin and Diana just got married, and they were both beaming with joy. Just when Diana was about to have their first born, Robin was severely paralyzed neck down by polio. It was never easy for Robin to be confined to the hospital and not being able to do anything. But with Diana, she’s willing to do anything for Robin. Hers was a love that is willing to conquer all.
The thing I place the most emphasis on—the integrity of the therapeutic relationship—is not diluted in any way because we are connecting through a screen. — Melissa Stringer, LMHC, DCC, NCC
Diana did every means to get Robin out of the hospital despite the doctor’s disapproval. Her love for Robin triumphed over all obstacles, and she was able to take Robin home. They lived together – herself, Robin, and Jonathan – in a home full of love and support. Diana did not give up on Robin and Robin did not give up on his disability for himself, his family, and for others who were suffering the same fate as him.
Everything Happens for a Purpose
Not the hospital, the bed, or the chair stopped Robin from moving forward and finding a purpose in his life. At first, he just wanted to be out of the hospital, then he aimed to see his son grow, be with his friends, to touch other people’s lives, and be of help to others like him. He never stopped until his last breath.
Sometimes, it’s not the length of time we spend here that matters but what we do with our lives while we are here. Robin never let his immobility become a hindrance. He traveled many countries with his family and friends to spread awareness that people like him should not be a prisoner in the four walls of the hospital.
In my practice, I help individuals to wonder about their partners, to ask questions they’ve never dared ask, to sharpen their vision of self and other. — Mary-Joan Gerson Ph.D.
He would not have been able to achieve anything if not for his wife and son’s love, understanding, patience, and support. They were able to raise Jonathan well that he had accepted their family’s fate and was able to live with it. Jonathan became his mom’s shoulder to cry on when she needed one, the warm hands that calmed her when she was sad. He was the strength of his father, the precious gem that made him smile and dream on, the hope that kept him going.
Severely Disabled Family Members
Robin can be your husband, parent, child, or sibling, but one thing is for sure – it’s not easy to take care of a severely disabled person. It’s very tiring and exhausting, and their temper would just make you want to give up.
There are many Dianas and Jonathans out there. Though they were able to give their support to a family member suffering from the curse of disability, they, too, need caring and help. They need someone who will uplift their spirits to be able to keep going. They also need strength. Diana and Jonathan were lucky to have each other and some friends to help them get through, but such is hard to find nowadays.
In either environment—on Skype or in-person—what matters most in terms of outcome is the fit between the client and the provider. — Jane Adams Ph.D.
Taking care of a disabled person won’t allow you to be out of the house for an extended period. It keeps you confined in your home, too. Online therapy is the answer to your longing need for a warm touch and an empathic ear that will listen to you. Visit https://www.betterhelp.com where their therapists are always willing to listen and give care, advice and support you need.